Harey Tales, is an occasional post capturing the views of Hares with respect to those deranged Malthusians claiming unceasing love for them.
It is three days following the Ides of October, and we find our friend Wopsy, at home, perusing news reports on his Tablet—for Wopsy is much more a modern high-tech hare then the his patron, the older intrepid Flopsy. Suddenly, he pushes the tablet aside and exclaims:
“Shaziza! This is extraordinary!”
Wopsy’s friend, Hopsy, was sitting only a few yards away, his attention absorbed by a game of Minecraft. Startled by Wopsy’s outburst, he glanced up and asked, “What is extraordinary?”
“Why, these latest news reports showing that Donald Trump is pulling ahead in the polling in all seven of what the humans call ‘swing states’. . . It’s astounding!”
“Oh, who cares about any of that stuff,” muttered Hopsy, as he returned to the action on his computer screen.
Wopsy looked inquiringly and a little impatiently at his friend. Hopsy was no popinjay, but at the same time everyone knew he was not the brightest of hares. How to make him understand the larger picture of things? How to get him to see the significance? Straining his brain, Wopsy began,
“Hopsy, let me tell you a true story. It is one I once heard from my dear friend Flopsy.”
“That old fossil?” snorted Hopsy.
“Hush up, and pay attention. The story begins many years ago when the land of chipmunks found itself in great turmoil.”
“Oh, I love those little guys.”
“Yes. . . well, as I was saying, our friends, the chipmunks, found themselves in a dire situation. A small group among them had taken control and installed a horrible tyranny over the entire chipmunk race.”
“Is this going to take long?” Hopsy interrupted, “I’ve just started to build a bridge, and I’m being threatened by a creeper,” gesturing at his computer screen.
“Be quiet, and you might learn something useful. This tyranny was woefully oppressive. All of the seeds and nuts gathered by the chipmunks were seized by the tyrants and doled out to their friends. Those who spoke out were ostracized, and the young-born of the chipmunks were turned against their parents. Everyone was upset. Many of them began to fear for the future. The final straw was when the tyrants made a deal with the aggressive foxes who they invited into the chipmunk realm. These foxes terrorized the chipmunks and even killed and devoured some of them.”
Hopsy turned away from his game and asked, “Wow, what happened next?”
“What happened next was truly glorious. These chipmunks, you see, had long been solitary creatures, and they were even divided by their differences. Some had brown hair, some had gray; some had spots and others didn’t; some ate seeds, others ate fruit. They were divided and distrustful of one another. But then at a mass meeting of all the oppressed chipmunks, one brave individual stood up and said, ‘If we quarrel and are suspicious of one another, based on what we did in the past, then we are doomed. But if we unite, we will be more than enough to throw out our oppressors.’ So, they did.”
“What do you mean, ‘they did’”?
“They rose up. Not all of them. Some stuck with the tyrants, but the tyrants having no real use for them let the foxes eat them. But the others. . . the others were heroic! They came together and expelled the tyrants and then the foxes. But that was only the beginning.”
“What do you mean?”
“They drew up a document, which they all signed, declaring their inalienable rights. No more arbitrary rule, no more ruling class of privileged chipmunks, no more oppression. No more corruption of their children. They began to work together to improve their yearly harvests of wild edibles, they nurtured their young, and they declared peace with all other creatures. That was many years ago and the result is the happy creatures we now see laughing and playing as we hop through the forest.
“Is this all true?”
“It’s completely true, and it shows what is possible if we fight for the future.”
Wopsy picked up his Tablet, pointed to the article he had been reading, and added, “I think the humans have begun to learn this lesson.”